Kicking The Persistent Pain Habit
Persistent pain can feel like it’s taken up permanent residence in your life.
It dictates what you do, how you move, and even who you believe yourself to be.
You may have tried countless treatments, exercises, diets, and devices. Some might have helped for a while… yet the pain found its way back. And each time it returns, it’s harder not to believe that this is just how life will be now.
But what if the pain isn’t just a symptom — what if it’s become a habit?
What Is the Pain Habit?
Not a habit in the sense that you choose it.
But in the way the brain and nervous system get so good at producing the pain response that it starts running automatically, just like breathing or blinking.
Your nervous system’s job is to protect you. If it experiences repeated signals of threat — physical, emotional, or both — it wires those responses in. Over time, pain can become less about current damage and more about memory, association, and prediction.
This is why symptoms can appear without a clear trigger… or stick around long after the body has healed. The pain is real — but the reason it persists may be more about the brain’s interpretation than the body’s condition.
This pattern is what I call the persistent pain habit — and understanding it is one of the first steps in persistent pain recovery.
Sarah’s Story (pseudonym used to protect privacy)
Sarah was in her late forties when she came to see me.
She’d had lower back pain for almost six years — starting after a minor lifting injury at work. The initial strain had healed within weeks, but the pain never really left.
Over time, her life had quietly shrunk. She avoided certain chairs, carried cushions to social events, and had stopped gardening altogether.
She’d tried physiotherapy, medication, injections, and even experimental treatments abroad. Each one offered hope… and each one faded.
When I asked Sarah about her days, patterns began to emerge.
The pain often flared during stressful meetings, long drives, or even when she was thinking about certain tasks.
Her body had learned to associate these situations with danger — and, like a well-rehearsed routine, it responded the same way every time.
Sarah wasn’t just experiencing discomfort — she was stuck in a chronic pain pattern.
Why Pain Habits Stick
Pain habits are reinforced in subtle but powerful ways:
Behavioural patterns – Avoiding activities you believe will hurt.
Emotional associations – Linking pain to fear, frustration, or hopelessness.
Physiological priming – A nervous system that stays on high alert, scanning for danger.
None of this means the pain is “in your head” or imaginary.
It means your protective systems are doing their job too well, repeating the same script long after the danger has passed.
In this way, the nervous system and pain become tightly linked, with one constantly reinforcing the other.
Breaking the Cycle
Kicking the pain habit doesn’t happen overnight — but it can happen.
Think of it as a form of mind-body pain relief: changing how your nervous system interprets signals so it no longer defaults to protection when it isn’t needed.
Here’s what the process looked like for Sarah, and what it might mean for you:
Awareness – She began noticing when the pain showed up and what was happening around her.
Safety Signals – We introduced gentle, non-threatening movements and calming practices in situations that usually triggered pain.
Emotional Processing – Instead of pushing feelings away, she experimented with letting them surface without judgment.
Graded Exposure – Slowly reintroducing activities she’d been avoiding, in small, safe steps.
Consistent Repetition – Just as the habit was learned, it could be unlearned — but it required regular, deliberate practice.
The Shift
After a few months, Sarah’s relationship with her back — and her life — looked very different.
She still had occasional twinges, but they no longer ruled her decisions. She returned to gardening, sat through meetings without dread, and even booked a long-awaited holiday without planning her activities around her back.
The biggest change wasn’t just in her pain levels — it was in her confidence.
She’d learned that her body was capable of safety and resilience, and that she could trust herself again.
This was breaking the pain habit in action — not by forcing herself through pain, but by gradually teaching her body a new pattern.
Hope for You
Persistent pain is not a life sentence.
It is possible to teach your nervous system a new way to be — one where protection is balanced with freedom, and your body no longer feels like the enemy.
Kicking the pain habit is about replacing fear with trust, avoidance with engagement, and survival mode with living.
If you’d like to go deeper, The Pain Habit book explores this in detail, with real-life recovery stories and practical tools you can use right away.
Takeaway:
What’s one small thing you could do this week to show your body it’s safe?
You don’t have to figure this out alone. Here are some helpful next steps…
Join our FREE private Facebook group, The Pain Habit Community, to see how others have successfully returned to a pain-free life. Get support on your journey.
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